holy vagina

As I strolled through my neighborhood, aka da ghetto, I had a small four legged friend join me and my three large dogs on our afternoon walk. The little bugger was persistent, and came right up to my front door. Being the kind hearted neighbor I am, I decided to return this guy to his owner. This is a rarity for most people in da ghetto, because most people in da ghetto let their dogs run free, or just don't give a shit if a dog is running loose (or trying to bite me when I ride my bike). Here's the kicker. After speaking with a few neighbors I find out where this little pup lives, it's a weird walk up apartment, up a hill, all really inconvenient. After making it up a bazillion stairs I notice the door is open. I pop my head in only to discover a naked women lying on the floor, her vag in all of it's glory! Out of shock and disgust I instantly fled. But, after making it to safety at the bottom of the stairs, I pondered why this lady hadn't even heard me almost in her house yelling "hello!" Then I thought she might be dead. So, I had to go back and see if she was alive, and I really didn't want to keep her dog. I basically screamed "hello, hello, anyone in there?" (standing next to the door, one show was enough) and banged on her window for a few minutes and she finally woke up, completely cracked out , and I handed her the dog and busted out of there. I cannot believe I was forced to see some random lady's vag, ew. Also, I decided to name the dog Teeny Tiny Tuna, because that is what I thought her owner was saying. And it seems appropriate, given the circumstances.